Britney Spears Bathroom Hops and Porks Paps

So it seems Britney Spears was up to her usual crazy-assed self this past weekend.

She flaunted herself all over town purposefully in front of paparazzi and then got angry at them when they flocked to her. She’s a f**king head case. These videos just go to support the very reasons I hate this bitch.

In this first video Britney stops to take a picture of a mural – one she has probably driven by a million times before – but smelled a photo-op and decided to get out of her car and snap a pic. When the paps swarm her and make it difficult for her to take a picture, she calls them “motherf**kers” and says “I’m a person – just like you!” Basically she throws a tantrum and acts like a little diva cunt, hurling the f-bombs and the “y’all’s” as she freaks. She then bolts out of there in her car, only to return moments later after losing her memory card for her camera.

Now in this video, Britney reverts back to her mini-mart bathroom tactic. She walks into a gas station asking, “Do you have a potty?” while covering her mouth. She seems calm until a cameraman asks if she is sick. Then she runs to the commode. While inside the bathroom, the paps foam at the mouth just outside of the door. You hear a woman claim to be pregnant and say she needs the restroom. The paparazzi basically tell her to f**k herself, and she is left fuming. Britney’s assistant, or whoever, is let into the bathroom by Britney and the two probably do fat rails off each other’s twats. At one point you can hear Brit (very loudly) whining in a high pitched voice – screaming about some studio she wants. The conversation sounds like a five-year-old having a fit.

Britney at yet another gas station. Britney sits in her car as her friend “Carla” and a cameraman (who Britney will soon pork) take care of filling her up with gas. She lights up before taking off, surprising not throwing the match out the window on her way out..

Britney and new BFF Carla leave a Greek restaurant and Britney is on the hunt for a specific cameraman. She asks the paps about him and finds someone who says he will call the photographer- even though it’s his day off. Britney and Carla whisper back and forth like a couple of preteen girls.

Now Britney has a British accent and think it would be a good idea to go to a restroom in a Walgreen’s. Chaos ensues with the paps knocking things over and chasing her through the aisles. Carla and Brit head to the bathroom again…blah, blah, blah. As they probably Hoover up the blow the photographer Britney is sweet on gets grilled.

It must be time to head to another gas station – and another bathroom. The camera guy is driving Britney around. Britney still talks with the fake accent, and fails to find a bathroom at the station, so she heads back to the car where her new man is waiting.

In this final video, Britney (wearing her pink wig) and new guy arrive at The Penninsula Hotel, where employees there try and get the paps to leave. They threaten them with trespassing and police, but the little f**kers still persist in taking footage. Britney and dude get a room and the next time you see him is at 4 am, when he comes out for a cigarette. He is pestered by paparazzi who treat him like King Pap and supply him with a fresh pack of smokes. He tells his peers that he and Britney merely ‘had lunch’, which probably means he chowed her rotten box. Eww, I know.

And you thought you had an exciting weekend! Britney is so f**ked up! Sex & drugs, white trash style. I wouldn’t be surprised if the bitch was doing meth. The only reason she snorts blow is because she’s loaded. She can afford to. Otherwise she would be sitting in her moldy trailer with a shitload more kids (because she couldn’t afford the abortions) boinking the neighborhood meth dealer for a baggie.

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