Marlee Matlin is revealing some of her darkest secrets in a new tell-all book, I’ll Scream Later.

Matlin became America’s sweetheart after winning an Oscar in 1987 for Children of a Lesser God, but no one knew the personal struggles that fame would send her way.

She starred in the film with William Hurt (whom we know now has been aptly named), and the two began a whirlwind affair. She was 19 and he was 35. Soon after they began their relationship they moved in together and the relationship became destructive. Marlee became a cocaine addict and Hurt was an alcoholic.

Marlee says that she regularly endured abuse from Hurt.  It was common to acquire fresh bruises daily. In her book she writes that one of the most memorable nights of abuse was the night that she won an Academy Award.

She tells Access Hollywood, “I was afraid. I was always afraid… of him. But I loved him. I did. Or maybe I thought I did. But look, I was 19, he was 35.”

She also described a fight where Hurt threw her on the bed and ripped her clothes off as she cried and begged him not to.

When asked, “Did you ever think about filing charges against him?” Matlin says she was too afraid. “No, not at the time. I was so wrapped up in his world and my drugs. The drugs took over my life, took over my brain. I was 19 and I was alone in New York City. I had no friends there except my drug dealer.

“I could say that I understand how women are afraid to leave an abusive relationship. They should, but at the same time, I understand how they don’t know how.”

Did Matlin tell Hurt about the book before it was published?

“I did not. I had no contact with him. Really, I had nothing to say to him. He knows what happened, I know what happened. We both were there.”