Lindsay Lohan will be heading back to jail. Thug life.
Lindsay Lohan will serve 30 days in jail after being found in violation of her probation this morning.
Sentenced to 300 days in jail, 270 of those days will be stayed IF Lindsay Lohan follows the strict orders the judge has set before her.
Lindsay is required to begin serving her 30-days by November 9th. Although Judge Sautner said Lindsay is not be eligible for house arrest “or any other early release other than that required by law,” the Sheriff’s Dept. says she’ll only serve 20% of her sentence which equals 6 days. Apparently this is normal.
When she is released after 30-days she is to report to her probation officer immediately. Her last one quit (shocker), and a new one has been assigned. The judge warned Lindsay, saying that her new probation officer is a stickler and won’t stand for any baloney. (She won’t you know, she doesn’t stand for baloney!) “I suggest you obey all her requirements,” warned Sautner.
Lindsay will not be allowed to leave the country and may only leave the state with the approval of her probation officer. (Why am I picturing Buella Ballbreaker?)
During Lindsay’s hearing, Judge Sautner told the court she was “putting the keys to jail in the defendant’s pocket,” so to speak.
Her set terms? They’re not easy. At least they won’t be for Lindsay.
For the next five months Lindsay must complete 12 days at the morgue and 4 psychotherapy sessions a month, every month, until the end of March. If at any time Lindsay is not living up to her end of the deal the judge will put a warrant out for her arrest and she will serve out the remaining 270 days in the county jail.
Lindsay could have chosen not to accept these terms and instead chosen to serve her time, but she seemed optimistic that she can and will fulfill these terms. She even hinted she may complete her terms EARLY. (Ha – right!) As we all know, saying and doing are two different things in the Lohan world.
Anyone wanna place bets? Is Lindsay going to complete her terms, thus finally setting herself free of all this legal mumbo jumbo, or will she fail yet again and end up in jail AGAIN?
Lindsay started her sentence today – and her sentence ends today. Bitch is TEFLON! Forget anytime anyone is sentenced to 90-days or less, say officials, because there is a federal court order on overcrowding that generally releases anyone with such a sentence in just hours. No matter how many times they’ve been slapped on the wrist before.
