Phoenix Jones: Seattle Superhero

Seattle’s superhero/vigilante, Phoenix Jones saves the day (Photo Credit: Regan MacStravic)

Some of you may have heard about the Seattle May Day “riots” yesterday, where people gathered to protest big business, but unfortunatley as with most large events, there were a few who spoiled it for the rest.

“Black Bloc” anarchists (basically unemployed assh*les looking to destroy things) smashed storefront windows and attacked NIKE TOWN (while wearing NIKE’s no doubt), American Apparel and even Starbucks. Personally I thought May Day was a day to pick daisies, put them on your neighbor’s doorstep and do the “ding-dong ditch” routine, but apparently there is some political reasoning to be pissed off on this day. Yeah, I know why, but no, I am not going to get into it here. Anyhow, the #SeaMayDay riots in Seattle brought out the city’s own Superhero to protect and serve it’s inhabitants. Yes, you heard me right. Seattle has a Superhero. Jealous?

For those of you who don’t live locally, you probably have no idea what, or who, I am referring to. You see, Seattle has its own Superman, a superphero who goes by the name of Phoenix Jones. In full rubber black and gold costume, he patrols the streets at night looking to rescue people from assaults, to prevent theft, and to make people feel safer in their own city. He video records everything as he has had a couple legal issues in the past, and he has worked hand in hand with police at times (he also annoys them occasionally). Phoenix Jones is a modern day vigilante, and not surprisingly, he is quite liked around here.

During yesterday’s May Day riots, Phoenix and an unknown superhero companion protected the city’s federal building from protestors by maintaining a unified front with a big ol’ bottle of pepper spray. Some people (GAWKER included) are claiming Phoenix pepper sprayed the crowd unnecessarily but that’s not the case, it was his superhero partner Midnight Jack, who was being hit with rocks thrown by the anarchists as he was being surrounded. (Yes, there is more than one superhero in Seattle now, thanks to Phoenix.)

Phoenix describes the melee:

“As we were following the march, they started to go by the federal building; no problem. All of a sudden we hear crash, so we turned around and looked back and people were smashing windows with sticks and throwing rocks into the windows. At a certain point we’re standing in front of the building, stuff on fire, dudes throwing rocks and stuff and there’s 60 people in front of us and literally can’t leave, so now we have to defend the building because we can’t go anywhere else. It was sort of intense that way. Then I got hit with a little of the pepper bomb, so we went back-to-back to make sure they couldn’t circle us. Once we went back-to-back, we went in front of the door. I was like this and Jack was on my back.  We just stood there basically and made sure no one came in.”

“You’re not gonna destroy personal property, people’s cars and stuff,” Jones said. “You’re not gonna do general lawlessness when it’s my city. I’m not gonna put up with it.”

Some video of Phoenix and Midnight Jack from the Seattle May Day riots:

Some people think Phoenix Jones is a “nerd in tights”, but I like him. He has actually done some good in our city and is attempting to make it a better place to live and I don’t see anything wrong with that. Yeah, it’s a little weird for a grown ass man to be living life as a superhero, but I’m down with it. As long as it’s not my husband or something. Although a superhero costume for the bedro….uh, nevermind.

To make this story even more cray-cray, there is now a new villain in Seattle, someone who obviously wants to be recognized as Phoenix’s archenemy, and his name is Rex Velvet. Nope, I am not kidding. I just learned of this today, and I must say, he’s quite the videographer. I think I am completely loving this superhero crap, AND Rex Velvet:

Check out the Seattle Superheroes online:

Phoenix Jones on Facebook | Twitter 

Rex Velvet on Facebook | Twitter