Madonna Has Hired DNA Specialists To Clean Up After Her

Madonna is sick and tired of people making money off of her DNA, so she’s hired a “sterilization team” to clean up after her on her world tour, thereby demolishing any and every trace of her DNA.

A Portuguese concert promoter told the Daily Mirror, “We cannot even look at the dressing room, after it is ready, or even open the door. We can only enter after her sterilization team has left the room. There will not be any of Madonna’s DNA, any hair, or anything. They will clean up everything.”

The promoter added, “In the end it is all to protect her and make her feel comfortable. I do understand it, but it is taken to extremes.”

I honestly didn’t know there was a market for Madonna’s hair strands, skin cells, or her spit, but I guess you learn something new every day. People always tryin’ to make a buck. I wonder how artist Peter Reynosa would interpret this into one of his paintings of Madge?