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Celebrity Butt Plugs

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We hopped in the Double Viking time machine sixty years into the future to record the last words of many of today’s biggest celebrities. Here goes:

Paris Hilton: That was hot…

Britney Spears: Sean Preston, put down that knife right now!

Danny Devito: Farewell, mole people! Your king bids you adieu!

Nicole Richie: No thanks! I’m good with just water for now.

Justin Timberlake: I’m even gayer than Lance.

Stephen Hawking: ap’osifpoijasdfjasdkjfk;oj;alskdfj

Jennifer Garner: I…I’m a man. And Ben…Ben had a pussy…

Mary Kate Olsen: There were no Olsen “twins.” It was a mirror the whole time…

Ryan Seacrest: What…are you waiting for me to say “Seacrest out” or something? Not happening. Wait…

Jennifer Lopez: Wait, how do you say ‘Goodbye’ in Spanish? That’d be so perfect right now.

Will Smith: Yo…fuck that proper talking bullshit, son.

Gwen Stefani: That shit was bananas…

Fergie: Someone, get the bed pan…I can’t hold it in…

Brandon Routh: Remember when I was in that one movie? That was cool…

Tom Cruise: Katie, put down that gun! (BANG!) Aaaaargggh!!! (gargling noises) P.S. I’m gay.

Lindsy Lohan: Wooo! Happy New Yearsss!! 2007 is gonna rock!