Lindsay Lohan makes her way back to her car after spending the evening at the Bardot lounge.

[Photograph: © David Tonnessen, PacificCoastNews.com]

Pamela Anderson in London

Pamela Anderson leaving the ‘Whiskey Mist’ nightclub in Mayfair looking like hell, as she usually does when she’s loaded – or sober, anymore.

Pammy wasn’t feeling too social last night and left the club with her douchey looking guy friend after only 10 minutes. I think she was a little too geeked to be out mingling. By the way, who is that melvin that she is with? Is that Pee Wee Herman dressed like Tommy Lee?

I’m pretty sure Pam has become friends with botox because her forehead is much smoother than it has been in recent times. The photo on the right shows what it looked like just a few short months ago.

Girlfriend does not photograph like she once did. But there’s not a chance in hell that she’ll give up her partying lifestyle. 20-30 years down the road, she’ll be like that disco granny that used to frequent Studio 54 back in the 70s. Still clubbing. Still showing off her ass. Still boinking Tommy Lee..

She’s looking more and more like the voodoo doll from Trilogy of Terror, only with fried white hair and better teeth.

[Photographs: Ringo, PacificCoastNews.com]

Dennis Quaid flirts with a DUI

Dennis Quaid, wife & co. got a bit tipsy while dining at “Philippe by Philippe Chow”last night.

But despite their obvious buzz, they still plop into their car right in front of all the cameras. Then, as Dennis is about to pull away, police stop him and strongly suggest that he step out of the car and call a taxi. Of course Dennis obliged.

Ok, so first thing that pops into your head is, “Why didn’t they arrest him? They would have had it been me!” Well, I think I have a response to that. Even though I wasn’t there I can guarantee this is most likely the way is went down . . .

The paparazzi, noticing Dennis’ intoxication, see a police officer nearby. They tell the cop that Dennis is trashed, hoping to get the exclusive scoop on a Quaid DUI. Knowing the photographer’s intentions (it IS L.A.), and being as Quaid hadn’t taken off yet, the police give him an “out”.

Regardless of how it all happened, it’s a good thing it happened. Moron.

[Photos: ©BAUER-GRIFFIN.COM]

David Hasselhoff drunk in London – Nice pants.

David Hasselhoff’s drunken behavior just keeps getting him in the papers, this time, in London.

Hoff was there for Simon Cowell’s birthday party, but Hoff’s party lasted days.

For starters, a source told The Sun that he was so drunk during his stay that he pissed his hotel bed. They added:

“David is very hard to handle when he drinks, often very emotional and aggressive.”

Maria Weston, 44, a witness to Hoff’s behavior and a guest of the hotel, said the Baywatch star wa foul mouthed and sloppy.

“He was abusing all the staff, shouting at everyone. We were shocked – you’d think he was just some drunk, not a big star.”

After days of him drinking, Hasselhoff’s assistant became worried about him and called a doctor. Staff at the five-star St. Martins Lane Hotel had to contain David in the basement of the hotel because he was so out of control. The doctor who responded to the call, Dr. Paul Ettlinger, ended up getting hit in the face by Hasselhoff who was thrashing and acting out wildly. The incident left a bruise on Ettlinger’s forehead.

From there, the doctor then called an ambulance. Hoff was taken to Capio Nightingale Hospital to dry out. He stayed two nights in a private suite and was released yesterday.

Sad. He just cannot stop. Once he gets rolling the party is ON. And it doesn’t stop until he is physically unable to drink more. If he doesn’t stop soon he is going to die. Don’t be shocked if he does because there is only so much a body can take. Hoff needs some serious help, but he needs to help himself first.

David Hasselhoff drunk in 2007

David Hasselhoff was admitted to a hospital Sunday night after becoming extremely drunk.

Apparently his daughter was upset by how intoxicated he was and phoned her mom. 911 was then called and David was taken to the hospital. You know, the same old routine in the Hasselhoff household.

Back in 2007 Hasselhoff’s daughter filmed him in a drunken stupor, eating food from a plate on the floor. He has been in and out of rehab numerous times.

C’mon David, get it together. At least while your daughter is living under your roof. It’s very stressfull for children of alcoholics to watch their parents in such a state. A few years back, Hayley, then 14, was hospitalized after cutting herself. It’s obvious that her father’s alcoholism has affected her deeply. A sad situation.

UPDATE: David’s publicist is saying that David was not drunk at all. They claim that he has an ear infection and his equilibreum is off. Yeah riiiiiiiiiiight. Pass the scotch.

Hayden Panettiere might only be 20-years-old, but girlfriend has been partying in nightclubs for years.

Here she is again (above), leaving Madame Royale nightclub in Hollywood, trying unsuccessfully to be incognito. (Photograph: ©Hellmuth Dominguez, PacificCoastNews.com)

Hayden was busted earlier this year in a New York nightclub after she and friends entered through an employee entrance. Once security spotted her they confiscated her license which Hayden had a fit about. She ended up calling police and asking for her ID back. Funny thing is, she got it! Because she is a celebrity of course.

Police later told the press that they returned it because Hayden needed to fly to California the next day. Since when do police give two sh*ts what you are doing the next day? Oh yeah, if you’re a celebrity, that’s when!

PATHETIC. So Hayden still thinks she can trounce around, drinking in clubs because she is Hayden Panettiere. The effed up ting is that she is RIGHT! Primadonna. I can’t stand her.

So here she is, once again, living above the law. Leaving a bar after having a great time out, I’m sure. And no one will do anything about it -  even though everyone knows she was there, at Madam Royale in Hollywood. Hello, CA liquor board?

And everyone wonders why people hate celebrities.

Below: Hayden at age 16, drinking and smoking with none other than Paris Hilton.

Joe Francis beat Jayde Nicole, Brody Jenner tased

Super slimy Joe Francis beat the hell out of Brody Jenner’s girlfriend, Jayde Nicole last night and Brody Jenner ended up being tased!

Quite a night at Guys & Dolls nightclub!

Jayde and Brody claim that Francis was “relentlessly” hitting on a friend of theirs and Jayde decided to do something about it. So she threw a drink in his face. Not a smart move on her part because that just threw Francis into a rage.

Jayde claims Joe grabbed her by the hair, ripping some of it out, punched her in the face then threw her to the ground. But he wasn’t finished yet. When she was on the ground he kicked the sh*t out of her!

Security ended up breaking up the one-sided “fight” and drug Joe out of the club.On his way out Jayde’s boyfriend, Brody Jenner, followed him out, screaming at him the entire time, obviously wanting a piece of the douchebag. At one point Brody had an opportunity and he took it. He landed a punch right in Joe’s kisser. Then Brody got pulled off Joe and at some point was tased!

Craziness!

So the aftermath of all of this is that Jayde says she is going to press charges. However, I am not sure how possible this is going to be being as she assaulted him first. Yes, throwing a drink on someone IS assault. Yes, I know this from experience. I too, threw my drink on a redneck hillbilly at a bar in my early 20s and was seriously punched in the face afterwards. The police said I really couldn’t do anything about it since I was the first to assault. Have I thrown a drink in anyone’s face since? Nope. I have pretty much been cured of that. I’d be willingly to bet Jayde will be too.

Not that she (or I) deserved it mind you. I still think it is in extremely poor taste for a man to punch a woman, especially in the face with a closed fist. But was it right to throw the drink in the first place? Absolutely not. Let this serve as a lesson ladies, it’s not a smart thing to do.

Mr. Francis is currently on probation if I remember correctly, and I am quite sure this will be a violation. So will be be doing some time for this beat down? Hopefully. I’ll keep you posted.

Watch the video of Jayde talking about the attack here.

[TMZ]

Jaime Pressly was caught urinating in public, accidentally, outside the Abbey, during her bridal shower the other day.

The images caught made it pretty obvious that the actress was totally wasted and couldn’t handle her liquor.

She was spotted squatting, in a dress, on the sidewalk with a stream (and dribbles) of pee underneath her.

Her explanation for urinating? That she was pulling a prank. YEAH, RIGHT! She couldn’t even get up on her own, she had to have help!

Jaime posted her lame excuse on Twitter:

“Yes…that is me doing dare #8 at my bridal shower..Things are not always what they seem..

“Notice my hand in the back. Its pouring a bottle of water!!! C’mon guys! Do you think i would really pee in the entry way to the Abbey in broad DAYLIGHT!!!

Yes, Jaime, yes we do! Water bottle? Nowhere to be seen. Maybe it was up her…oh nevermind!

Artie Lange was busted for suspicion of DUI Friday afternoon in New Jersey.

My guess is Artie is on another one of his infamous benders.

Lange was arrested around 3:00 PM EST in Toms River after he was involved in a car accident.

This guy is a walking dead man. Seriously, he has admitted to doing outrageous amounts of cocaine and drinking massive quantities of booze for years now. (Although recently he has claimed over and over that he is clean & sober..) He always drives, and yes, sometimes his stories of getting wasted are absolutely hysterical, but in reality, it’s not that funny.

It’s only funny until he kills someone – or himself.

[TMZ]