John Mayer can be such a dork. Right now he’s obsessed with his hair and anytime reporters speak with him he changes the subject to his new, feathered, 80s haircut.

From People magazine,

“I want everyone who reads People magazine to know how important this haircut is. It’s important because it draws people together. Feel it. Run your fingers through my hair, and tell me what it feels like.”

And hair was the only topic on Mayer’s mind, having brushed off questions about his Miami weekend with Jennifer Aniston, saying, “Forget about blogs.” Instead, Mayer took this reporter’s hand and insisted that she run her fingers through his hair again — and again.

“Run your fingers through it all the way and describe what it feels like,” he said, before demanding, “Now, write a haiku about what my hair feels like.” It couldn’t be done on the spot. “That’s the thing,” he said. “No one can do it,” before climbing into the front seat of his car and driving away.

So of course now readers are writing Haiku’s about John’s new ‘do. Me included. They are kinda fun to read, but it’s obvious some people have no idea what a Haiku is. Go ahead, write your own. Yours might get featured on People magazine.

Silken layered locks

His haircut’s a wonderland

Bringing 80s back

Remember when I used to do those Conan O’Brien-ish ‘If They Mated’ posts? If you have read the Smack long enough, you’ll recall.

Well, David over at Pretty on the Outside came up with a genius rendition of Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon morphed together. I’d like to think this is the lovechild of the two. Isn’t she/he gorgeous? Heh.

Check out David’s site for more celebrity photoshop/artsy-fartsy fun!  He rocks!

Everyone loves to make fun of celebrities, and these sites are no exception.

Check out what happens when you combine celebrities, technology, a warped sense of humor and a little bit of imagination..

As they say, it’s better to be pissed off than pissed on.

Natalie Portman found out the hard way while in New York recently. While stooping down to check out some pups one gave her the fire hydrant treatment.

Unfortunately for her, someone was there to snap a pic.

They say Nat took it well despite the urine on her expensive coat.

Check out what it’s like to ride a train in Japan. You’d never fit that many Americans in there, that’s for sure. Heh.

In this video Erykah Badu dishes advice for young women starting out in the music industry.

Boobs, ass, calf implants, and bitches you got to wear the stilettos no matter what. Hair extensions are great too, but a new scalp is even better! Also, you MUST tongue kiss another woman. You just have to. As far as fashion goes, you’re best off wearing nothing but glitter all over your body and a beeper.  (Are we sure she isn’t talking about Mariah Carey here?)

This bitch knows what she is talking about, listen up, hookers!

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