I’d say that this isn’t a very good shot of Audrina Patridge, but I haven’t noticed because I’m in love with her shoes!

For more than 100 new promotional photos of the Season 5 cast (highly airbrushed of course), check out MTV.

Related Smacks

• Heidi Montag Hospitalized “I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here”
• MTV’s ‘Real World’ Stars, Where are They Now?
• Chanel from Fantasy Factory [Photos]
• ‘Kate Plus 8′ Premieres Nov. 2!
• Jeff & Jordan on The Early Show [VIDEO]

Related Smacks

• The Hills Season 5 Promotional Poster
• Love Her or Hate Her, Lauren Conrad is One Smart Cookie
• Lauren Conrad Screws the Pooch

I have bitched and moaned about celebrities going out to get wasted then driving home (without a driver/taxi) for years now.

But still, we see a new star busted for DUI all too often, regardless of their being extremely wealthy and/or well-known.

Lauren Conrad is one of the stars who won’t be caught in that predicament. She hires a driver. And thank God! Check out Lauren as she leaves a Hollywood nightclub the other night. She is totally sloshed, stumbling and trying to get into the wrong car. Luckily her “people” and driver were there to help the poor girl out and escort her home safely.

Related Smacks

• Pamela Anderson Too High for the Clubs
• Motorized Lazy Boy DUI
• Dennis Quaid Escapes DUI
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• American Hasselhoff in London

Lauren Conrad attended the Humane Society and Animal Fair magazine’s dog-fashion show last night and was supposed to walk the runway with a pooch for charity – instead she left the organizers high and dry refusing to follow through with her obligations.

The event included celebrities and socialites who wore coordinating outfits with either their own dog or a rescue dog, and would stroll the catwalk together. The idea was that after the show the outfits would be auctioned off on eBay to raise money for the animal charities.

Lauren was flown out first-class by the Humane Society and Animal Fair to close the show with a ‘big name’. However, once she got there she was difficult and didn’t want to be bothered with it.

She had no idea what kind of dog she was holding and didn’t seem to care. When a reporter asked her, “What kind of dog is it?” she looked at her publicist hoping she would know. A moment later Conrad carelessly, yet accidentally, slammed the rescue dog into the lens of a video camera. Hard. But we hear the dog is fine.

Law and Order’s Richard Belzer, Real Housewives of New York’s Ramona Singer, and Hairspray’s Nikki Blonksy all did their part to help raise money for the rescued animals, but not little Miss Conrad.

At the end of the show, when Lauren was due to come out and strut her stuff Robert Verdi announced that she was backstage, but would not take her walk. He let the crowd know in a roundabout sort of way what was going on.

“She’s on The Hills. And she’s not coming out. You don’t want to believe the shit that happens with these girls. Anyway, that was it! Thanks for your support!”

The grumbling crowd wasn’t too pleased as they paid $100 to $5,000 for tickets to the event.

Conrad left the show the split second it ended, refusing to answer questions on the way. A PR member of the event whispered to a reporter for NY Mag, “She’s got a bit of an attitude.”

Wendy Diamond, the editor-in-chief of Animal Fair magazine, arranged for Conrad to be a part of the event and was extremely disgusted by Lauren and her publicist’s behavior.

“Her publicist didn’t tell her it was a fashion show. That’s what she said. I just think it’s really rude. We spent probably $10,000 in bringing her here. If you’re going to fly here first-class and get a suite at a hotel for you and your assistant, then that’s what you deal with. There’s no cats here, so we didn’t need any catfights.”

But she didn’t miss the opportunity to take a couple final swipes at Lauren,

“I personally don’t care about Lauren Conrad nor The Hills show — never watched it. I’m disappointed for the animals.”

Related Smacks

• Alex Rodriguez Has Paintings of Himself Over His Bed
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• Jessica Simpson’s Dog Daisy Still Missing
• Michael Vick Press Conference VIDEO
• Michael Vick Reinstated

Or as many of you might be thinking, ‘Threesome!’

Lauren Conrad is like the younger version of Carmen Electra, except Lauren is a bit more reserved than Carmen was back in her MTV days.

And I doubt that Lauren has ever stuck a large uncooked piece of pasta up someone’s ass either. Remember that with Dennis Rodman? Heh. One of my favorite stories! But I still don’t buy that he didn’t like it!

Past Smacks

• Kara Kopetsky is Still Missing [Photos, Video]
• Lunchtime Quickie Links
• Lindsay Lohan’s OK! Rehab Photo Shoot
• Jessica and Her New Hair Extensions
• Tommy Lee Apologizes to Alicia Keys for Fight with Kid ‘Pebble’

Photo Source: CelebUtopia.net

Past Smacks

• Spicy Links!
• Back By Popular Demand!
• Dennis Quaid’s Twins: ‘Fully Recovered’
• Todays Celebrity Birthdays
• Britney Almost Misses Plane Home to LA