This time as the show opens, (April 22nd/10PM) Tila Tequila has the contestants cage dance in two huge cages. Guys in one, girls in the other, of course.

There’s nothing like a bunch of attention whores stripping in a cage together all vying for the attention of the camera..

“The Biggest Loser” winner Alison Vincent didn’t only win the title of Biggest Loser, she also landed herself a spot on a milk advertisement.

The ‘Got Milk?’ advertisement reads:

“It feels good to lose… It feels good to win. So along with eating right and keeping fit, I drink milk. Drinking three glasses of lowfat or fat free milk a day helps you get the calcium and nutrients your body needs. Plus, the protein helps build muscle. Now that’s a strong finish. Milk your diet.”

She looks amazing!

After the finale of Rock of Love 2 Sunday night we are all left to wonder: Did Bret Michaels truly find his ‘Rock of Love‘ this season?

Last years winner Jess didn’t have a connection whatsoever with Bret and it was revealed at the reunion show that the two never saw one another after taping ended. Was it the same with Ambre?

The Associated Press interviewed Bret and asked him these things as well as a few other interesting tidbits about the show and himself. And yes, they talk about the hair!! Check out the interview along with my translations of what Bret is really saying. Heh.

AP: Is this just a show for entertainment, or did you really go into this thinking that you were going to find true love?

Michaels: I said this from day one: I went into this to have fun and maybe find someone to like. True love is not going to be found instantly on a TV show. That is only for scripted shows. Scripted reality, they give someone a show. It is the reason “Rock of Love” has been the No. 1 show. It has been kept as real as possible. Anyone thinking they are going into a TV show finding love, they might find someone that they like and eventually learn to like them more. I think finding true love, I never went in with that intent.

(Spicy’s translation: No. Just hoping for a little publicity, a couple BJs and maybe a good lay.)

AP: Did you find true love this time?

Michaels: I found someone who is really nice and cool and gets rock ‘n’ roll. We can see where it goes from here.

(Spicy’s translation: No true love, but I am gittin’ some..)

AP: Do you feel that doing a reality show hurts your credibility as a rocker?

Michaels: I am a rock star/musician who has had, with a lot hard work, a continuous and long career with or without reality TV. When I went in and they came after me when I was going to do “Rock of Love,” they gave me this novelty concept. They were trying to go back to ‘86. I lived ‘86. I loved ‘86, but I live in 2006/2007. I love my spandex and cowboy boots from ‘87. I thought it was fantastic. (But) I didn’t want my show to be a novelty. I have generations of fans. I think the show has been a plus for this reason: it has exposed my solo act. It has exposed that this is really me.

(Spicy’s translation: Nope, because I haven’t been a recognized as a credible rocker in twenty years.)

AP: What are the most important lessons you learned from being in a house with a bunch of women?

Michaels: One good lesson that I have learned is patience. Even if you are not listening, act like you are listening. Even if you are in the background watching ESPN, listen or pretend to be listening. If you are going to use the same nice charm and jokes, try not to take three women on a date at the same time so that each of them does not know you’re using it.

(Spicy’s translation: Lie your ass off.)

AP: Isn’t it every man’s dream to date three women at once?

Michaels: The date is the dream because it looks good for your image. However, saying lines while the other ones can hear it and then turning to another and saying the same line is not a smart move.

(Spicy’s translation: Yes, but not on this show.)

AP: Did you get overwhelmed dating three women at once?

Michaels: No, I was thinking it was actually awesome. It is a lot like the tour bus. It is like backstage. I had years to prepare me for the show.

(Spicy’s translation: I want everyone to know I still have a tour bus and groupies backstage!!)

AP: On the first season, you picked Jess. The relationship did not work out. What went wrong?

Michaels: No one explains to you in the world of reality TV that when you are done, you spend five or six months a part. This is told to you at the end of the show. You get done — there are months where you can’t be traveling and doing stuff (together) because they don’t want anyone to take a picture of you. If I get out at LAX, they have the TMZ people there. If someone gets a picture of you on vacation together with a cell phone, it’s over.

(Spicy’s translation: Helloooo TMZ, are you reading this? You can catch me at LAX!)

AP: Did you have a conversation with Jess about breaking up?

Michaels: When she came back from the show, she was cold as ice and angry. I put her on the spot. I said, “Listen, if it is for show, why would I be inviting you to dinner?” At the reunion, they never showed this, but I said, “How long have you been with your boyfriend?” Her boyfriend and her sell shirts in Chicago. Maybe you should ask her who is for show. I thought she was a pretty girl and intelligent and funny. All the other girls told me she has a boyfriend who sells shirts in Chicago and that was the shirt she was wearing the whole show.

(Spicy’s translation: I’m good at twisting things.)

AP: How difficult is it to find out the truth about these women?

Michaels: Therein is the challenge — getting to the bottom of what the truth is. You know if anyone goes on a date it is the face of a stranger. The true colors (eventually) come out. I am what I am. I tell them, “I play flag football with my friends on the weekends. I like to race motorbikes. I have muscle cars.” I am not saying change is bad. You can look and see what I have been doing for the last 20 years.

(Spicy’s translation: Me, me, me….!!)

AP: Will there be a “Rock of Love 3″?

Michaels: I don’t know … We are looking to do a show called “Bret Michaels Big Rock Road Show” which is just rockers gone wild on the road. I never say never. Right now I am not mentally there. I am having fun doing it and I am thankful to the fans that made the show number one. The girls made the show great.

(Spicy’s translation: As soon as possible.)

AP: What are you hiding under that bandanna?

Michaels: My hair is combined of my hair and the finest extensions Europe has to offer. I do the show without it on all the time and they wont film me. They are like, “Put your bandanna back on. It is your image.” It is my signature thing.

(Spicy’s translation: Liver spots.)

Last night was the season finale of Rock of Love 2, did you guess the person that Brett chose?

I didn’t. I thought for sure Brett would be picking the puffy lipped, big-tittied, tattooed rocker slut, Daisy, but instead he went with the control freak, know it all, I-wish-I-was-32 ‘TV Host’, Ambre.

Initially I liked Ambre, but as the competition went on she started to annoy the hell out of me. Even her hair pissed me off.

Ambre felt as though she was better than everyone because she was older and is a fricking television host…whoppee. She couldn’t wait to bring it up in every episode, and point out the fact that Daisy was a stripper. Look at you Ambre, you are SO accomplished. I mean you’re on Rock of Love for Pete’s sake.

Ambre thought she was the alpha bitch of the house and towards the end of the show she turned everything into a confrontation.

And as for her flashing her pantyless crotch the night before elimination (not once but twice), is that what a TV host does, Ambre? Because I thought that’s what strippers did…

Not that I cared for Daisy either. Bitch’s face is busted! And that’s after surgery! Daisy is a needy groupie looking to be rescued. That’s about that.

Even though Ambre won, I bet she and Brett aren’t joined at the hip as she had hoped. Sorry about your luck Ambre. You’re just another groupie looking for her 15 minutes of fame on a reality show, television host or not.

Bret Michaels has been added to a lawsuit filed by the owner of the $9M Rock of Love mansion, who is claiming Michaels and Mindless Entertainment Inc. broke their contract.

The VH1 reality show was shot in the mansion last winter and owner Ray Sahranavard says that during that time $380,000 worth of damage was done to his home which is located in Encino, CA.

Sahranavard is also claiming that Mindless Entertainment told him that they purchased an additional $3M in liability insurance in case anything was damaged. The company is refuting those claims.

The alleged damage includes holes in the walls and ceilings, all doors were removed, lawn and outdoor plants had died, and almost the entire inside of the house had been repainted.

Producers tried to talk their way out any responsibility for damages claiming that Bret was not monitored 24/7 and that they have no control of what happened during the times he wasn’t. So basically, they blamed him, leading him to be added to the lawsuit.

The home owner is claiming fraud, negligence and negligent misrepresentation. He is also accusing Michaels of intentional destruction of property.

Oh, how I love reality shows, but they just keeping worse and worse!

Some, like A Shot at Love, are the new Jerry Springers. They’ll give anyone their own show these days and it seems only people with major issues get casted as contestants. Then they’re supplied with enough booze to take down a Yeti while living in a mansion full of cameras. Guaranteed trainwrecks!

A Shot at Love 2 premieres Tuesday April 22nd at 10 PM ET/PT.

So if you have been struggling through this season’s Bad Girls Club on Oxygen like me, you know that the drama, the anger and the slut factors have all been upped compared with last years girls.

You and I know that this mostly means these girls have terribly low self-esteems, which lead them to do desperate and mean things to others and even themselves. I’ll just say that Oxygen did a great job of digging up some truly f*cked up girls this year.

One of the girls is Cordelia, a seemingly nice enough girl who your first impression is most likely to be of the girl next door. Not so, she’s more like the whore you read about while you’re on the sh*tter.

This is a little racy for front page news kids, so to read more about her porn past, and see the video, take a peek under the cut.

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