No. 5 — Britney Spears: The pop princess, who at one time was one of the biggest sex symbols in the world, was criticized for gaining “two kids, two useless ex-husbands, and about 23 pounds of Funyun pudge.”

No. 4 — Madonna: The Material Girl literally wrote the book on ‘Sex’ in the ’90s, but since then she’s turned off the magazine’s editors with her “bellyaching and rapid postnuptial deterioration.”

No. 3 — Sandra Oh: The ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ star made the list thanks to her “cold bedside manner and boyish figure.”

No. 2 — Amy Winehouse: The ‘Rehab’ singer’s “translucent skin, rat’s nest mane and lashes that look more like surgically attached bats” weren’t enough to put her on top — or, rather the bottom.

No. 1 — Sarah Jessica Parker: The former ‘Square Peg’ was singled out for being a “Barbaro-faced broad” and “the least sexy woman in a group of very unsexy women.”

Past Smacks

• Did Josh Duhamel Cheat on Fergie?
• Larry Birkhead & Attorney Publicly Challenge Anna Nicole to Paternity Test
• Kristen Stewart Drops Award MTV Movie Awards [VIDEO]
• Paris Hilton Banned From Moscow Hyatt
• John Mayer Drunk Publicity Stunt