Not like that you sick bastard..

Tyra Banks poses as Michelle Obama in the September issue of Harper’s Bazaar.

Banks, who has made no secret for her love for Barack and Michelle, did a magazine spread in which she poses with an Obama look-a-like.

In the magazine’s interview she says, “When Barack won the nomination, I just started bawling. I started calling all these people, and everybody was talking to me like I was crazy. They’re like, ‘Well, he hasn’t won yet,’ but I’m like, ‘Yes, he has, because he’s gotten this far.

“So what gives me tears is if Barack Obama wins, kids are going to say that a black man can be president, too. I think it will give so many people – black, Latin, Asian, even white people that feel forgotten – hope. I did not think I would see it in my lifetime, and I’m only 34.”

Tyra notes that behind every good man is a good woman, and that is the case with the Obamas.

“With Barack Obama, his becoming president is them becoming president because Michelle was there from the beginning. Without Michelle, he wouldn’t be there.”

Tyra goes on to call Michelle, “One hot mama,” and when asked what her advice to Michelle would be she basically says for her to keep it real.

“Oh, I want her to not take herself too seriously. She’d need to know how to take a fierce picture, but at the same time be able to eat fried chicken, have grease on her fingers, and be okay with getting photographed like that, too. I’d want her to feel like every child in America is hers – to have a true connection.”

[US]

In next weeks Steppin’ Out magazine, Alison Arngrim (Nellie Oleson on “Little House on the Prairie”) sits down with Chaunce Hayden and admits who was the REAL bitch on “Little House on the Prairie - and that’s just for starters.

Arngrim’s interview was pretty damn interesting to tell you the truth, she tells some behind the scenes dirt on Little House, shares about the sad & tragic life of Dana Plato and says she even knew Liberace as a child!

Here are the best excerpts from the juicy interview:

THE REAL “LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE” BITCH:

That’s an easy call. The biggest bitch on the set of “Little House On The Prairie” was Melissa Sue Anderson! Poor little blind Mary. She was seriously high maintenance. She’s not working now. She finally gave up. Plus she married a guy with a lot of money. But the worst part about Mary Sue is that she denounced her U.S. citizenship! She moved to Canada and last year swore in on Canadian TV as a Canadian citizen! Really? How many American’s do you know who denounce their American citizenship? So many actors are desperate to become Americans. But she denounced her citizenship. Not even Johnny Depp who moved to France denounced his American citizenship. Not even the Baldwin’s who keep threatening to leave the country have denounced their American citizenship! But Melissa Sue Anderson said, “Screw you America!” She was so difficult on the show. Okay, playing a blind girl is a drag, but she was a bitch before she went blind. I really think it was her mother. She was the worst stage mother. She was a very troubled woman. Almost as bad as Dina Lohan. It was like hanging out with Yoda all day. I really don’t know what her trip was. If the show was being done now, she would be wearing hair extensions and having her nails done on the set. She would be totally Paris Hilton about the whole thing.

ON LIBERACE (WHOM HER FATHER MANAGED):

My dad would take Liberace to Vegas and so me and my dad would take him. I called him Uncle Lib. I would go trick or treating at his house and a butler would come to the door with a silver try and give me little plastic pumpkin’s with jelly beans in them. Very high end.

There’s a photo of Liberace and me when I was just eight years old. Back than I just thought he was insane. I thought he was nuts. He would send a booklet to all the small towns on how to promote the show…who to call, how to advertise the show and how big his name should be on the banner. It was hilarious. It was a book on how to sell tickets. Plus he insisted nobody say he was gay. He had so many female fans who were madly in love with him and he was convinced they would be upset if they knew. But I was eight and I totally knew he was gay! My dad would say, “don’t say anything about Liberace being gay.” I say, “Um, dad… I’m eight and I know he’s gay.” The man is wearing rhinestone hot pants and his show is freakishly gay. He’s the f–king definition of gay!”

ON DANA PLATO:

I went to her funeral. She was portrayed as this wild, hard drugging, sexy thing. But she was this innocent little bunny rabbit of a person. She was very, very naive. I remember thinking, “Gosh, I hope she doesn’t get in trouble?” She would just get into somebody’s car if they asked her. She eventually got into drugs because she didn’t know any better. Right before she died she was doing weird stuff like going to orgies at these weird swingers parties. Even then I don’t think she got what she was doing. “Oh, I’m supposed to take off all my clothes? I guess we’re going swimming!” I don’t think she ever got what she was doing and with whom. It was just so bizarre. By the time she died 5 guys thought they were married to her and another six guys thought they were her manager. It was just a mess. Even her funeral was a train wreck. Her relatives sold her funeral to “Entertainment Tonight.” It was just sick. She was treated by her management like a profoundly disabled retarded child and a hostage. It was insane.

ON GOING ON LARRY KING AND ADMITTING TO BEING MOLESTED AS A CHILD:

If you have to admit you’ve been molested as a child, Larry King is the place. He’s very polite. Before the interview even starts he says, “Look, during the interview I might ask you something that sounds totally intrusive and weird.” You don’t have to actually answer it. I just have to ask it because it’s what the audience is thinking. So just don’t answer it even though I’m asking you. I thought, “Oh wow, so this whole thing is a set up! Okay, great!” Basically Larry is asking me questions that we both know I’m not going to answer. You get full warning. He asked me who abused me and what sick things he did to me sexually. But off camera he said, “We can’t even go there so don’t worry. Our legal department won’t let us. So we don’t even want you to answer the question.” Everybody looks good.

ON THE PERSON WHO SEXUALLY ABUSED HER:

I would give out his name and address but he would just get a publicist and do a mini press tour. Plus, what good would it do? The statue of limitations has expired. Nothing would happen to him anyway.If he had any money I would sue him, but he doesn’t have any money. He’s a celebrity wanna-be. But the police know who he is and they keep their eyes on him 24/7. Trust me, this person is very scared of me now. The tables have turned.

LIFE ON THE “LITTLE HOUSE” SET:

I had to wear a wig with a giant metal comb in the front that was digging into my scalp until it bled. I had to be a bitch! Plus, life in the 1800s was kind of horrible. We used to sit around on the set and play a game called “How bad would we smell.” Because during the show we bathed and used deodorant and we still smelled! Man did we stink! We reeked! So we used to imagine how bad we would smell if it was really1886. We wouldn’t be able to stand each other! Even the food stunk back then. Even the food on the set was terrible. They used to spray it down with pesticides because it would attract rats and bugs. So the prop men would spray the food down with bug spray. All the food was hosed down with RAID.

Verne Troyer was completely blindsided by his ex-girlfriend, Ranae Shrider, who leaked the couple’s sex tape to the media.

Verne is finally coming forward to explain his side of the story and to tell us a little more about the woman who could have sabotaged his career.

Q. How are you doing?
VT: “It’s hard right now. I’m avoiding the public right now because I don’t know what somebody’s going to say, or say to me, or anything like that. Unfortunately, I haven’t done anything except stay in my house right now.”

Q. What kind of support network do you have? Do you have people who are calling and checking up on you?
VT: “I have family, friends. You know, I have a lot of people here. It’s just, even if I go out with them, I’m still afraid of what somebody’s going to come up and say. So I’ve just been keeping it very low key.”

Q. Tell us how you feel about your privacy being invaded.
VT: “First off, the fact that I could be so close with somebody and then for them to do this, almost casually … that’s the biggest thing that gets me. Also, yeah, it is my privacy. It’s my private life, and it’s not meant for the public to see. That’s my life. So, it’s just been hard.”

Q. How did you guys meet?
VT: “We me at the Playboy mansion. (Laughs) It was a little less than a year ago. It’s been only like seven months ago. It was a New Year’s Eve party.”

Q. Was it hot and passionate right away?
VT: “It was slow. I was off working. I was in London doing The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus, so I was busy in the beginning of our relationship. It was mostly just phone conversations and things.”

Q. What attracted you to her?
VT: “She seemed like she was normal. I don’t know if I can stress ‘seemed.’ She seemed like a great person. I felt comfortable around her. I felt like I could really just be myself and not have to pretend.”

Q. Was she easy to talk to?
VT: “Yeah. Easy to talk to and easy to hangout with. It was just easy. Next time I know: If it’s too easy, then I will know something’s wrong.” (Laughs)

Q. Whose decision was it to do a sex tape?
VT: “It was basically both of our decisions. We both equally said, ‘Let’s do this.’ She came up with the idea and at the time, I thought it was great.”

Q. So she came to you, and you didn’t think anything of it?
VT: “I never thought it would get out to anybody besides us. In my wildest dreams, I never would have thought that she would’ve done anything like this.”

Q. “Did she give you the tape? How much trust did you put in her with this tape?
VT: “I put all the trust in her. She had the tape. Actually, she had the tape in her camera, which was on top of the closet where I couldn’t even touch it. I don’t have a copy. I just thought it was for us.”

Q. She admits to leaking some of the tape. How do you feel?
VT: “I feel vindicated that people know that it is her, but it doesn’t help how I feel as far as somebody that was in my life, doing that to me.

Q. How did you hear the footage was out there?
VT: “We had just broken up. I was in New York doing a press junket for Love Guru at the time. She called up, hysterical, and said the paparazzi approached her outside our front door and just showed little pictures of us from the videotape, and I believed her. Then as the stories kept going, it just got to be too ridiculous, and I knew that if she didn’t do it, she had something to do with it.”

Q. “Do you feel like she used this as a way to get famous?
VT: “It’s really funny because when I was with her, she wanted to be an actress, but she said that she didn’t want to be famous. I want to ask her now, ‘So are you now a ’serious actress’ with a sex tape?”

Q. So was the breakup mutual?
VT: “No, I broke up with her.”

Q. Can you talk about why?
VT: “Yeah, she couldn’t trust me and wouldn’t trust me.”

Q. She thought you were cheating on her.
VT: “Yeah, which I never did. It just got to the point where I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to be able to be me, and she wouldn’t believe anything I said so, there was no way I could’ve stayed in that relationship.”

Q. How did she react?
VT: “She was very upset, and I never thought in my wildest dreams that she’d be so upset as far as taking the tape and giving it to the public. But she was upset — I guess like anybody would be after a breakup. For me, it wasn’t that hard because I knew it couldn’t work.

Q. Did you love her?
VT: “When I broke up with her, no.”

Q. Did you love her at any point in the relationship?
VT: “I did at some point in time. I thought I could spend my life with her, but that was in the very early part of the relationship.”

Q. How do you feel about her now?
VT: “Hate is actually a good word. I just very much dislike her right now and the really sad part is, I have a house and she’s still renting out one of the rooms in the house, so I still see her, which makes it even harder.”

Q. How do you deal with that?
VT: “I don’t acknowledge her. Truthfully, I don’t really see her that often. I have my own room, and I have everything that I need in my room. I just don’t see her, which is good.”

Q. Can you get her evicted?
VT: “I’m in the process of seeing what I can do. She won’t leave.”

Q. As a famous person, is there always that concern that anybody you date is going to try use to further their career?
VT: “Of course, it crosses my mind. You know, I know right now I don’t want to date another girl for the rest of my life. I know that will change later, but at this point in time, I can’t trust anybody to have a relationship with, even a new friendship at this point.”

Q. If you date again, it will probably be somebody outside the industry?
VT: “I hope so.”

Madonna’s brother, Christopher Ciccone is out promoting his new book, My Life with Madonna, in which he goes public about his sister’s secrets.

In the interview he discusses the latest scandal involving Alex Rodriguez, Madonna’s relationship with Kabbalah, Guy Ritchie and the marriage and other juicy tidbits.

Ciccone surprisingly says that he doesn’t think that Madge and A-Rod are having an affair. He actually believes that Alex simply wanted to learn more about Kabbalah.

He goes on to describe Madonna when she was a child, saying she was ‘determined’. We get to see photos of a young Madonna, who was an absolutely adorable kid.

Christopher recalls the times when he and his sister were very close, saying they worked together and they lived together until Guy Ritchie came into her life. He says cattily,

He also accuses Guy of being homophobic. When asked to elaborate Christopher says, “He does [have a problem with gays], and he certainly has a problem with me.”

Check out the video for more from Christopher.

Here’s a clip of Brooke Hogan on Good Morning America this morning, blabbing about her screwed up family and doing a little self-promotion for her new lame reality show - in which she tries to prove to the world that she’s not daddy’s girl anymore.

Check the video for the entire interview, but here’s basically what goes on:

The interviewer made me laugh my ass off when one of her opening statements to Brooke was, “And you’re only 20 years old..” HA! Yes, can you believe only 20?! Brooke replies with, “Yes, but I feel like I’m 40 though.”

Bitch looks 40! And doesn’t she look totally look like her mother here?

Then Brooke is asked about her family and their reality show, Hogan Knows Best. And what she has to say is sugar-coated bullshit.

“The thing that I like about Brooke Knows Best is that it kind of carries on the Hogan tradition of always having a good moral at the end of the story.”

Did I just hear a Hogan say the word, ‘moral’? Bitch, please.

Anyhow, you get the gist of it. Check it out.

[RedLasso kinda sucks, if it doesn't load correctly, reload page.]

Eva Mendes is in the upcoming issue of Interview magazine and the interviewer brought up substance abuse, in a sometimes tasteless manner.

Eva was treated at Utah’s Cirque Lodge rehabilitation center earlier this year.

David Colman: Now let’s talk about substance abuse. My favorite topic.

Eva Mendes: Great.

DC: First of all, what is it with actors and substance abuse?

EM: I don’t know. I’m not a spokesperson for any kind of substance-abuse organization.

DC: They’re going to have to change the name of it to “Alcoholics Unanimous.”

EM: [silence]

DC: I’m sorry, that’s a bad joke.

EM: I’m not making jokes, because people die from this stuff. So, honestly, I think it’s a bit tacky that you made a joke. I’ve got to be honest.

DC: You’re angry. Listen . . .

EM: I’m not angry. People have died, and I’ve lost friends too–even recently. So I can be a little sensitive on the subject.

DC: Look, I haven’t had a drink in 11 years. I’m just trying to be light-hearted about it, because it’s an awkward topic.

EM: I’m not angry. But because celebrities’ lives are so visible, I think it makes it look lighter than it is. I have a really good sense of humor, I’m just very sensitive. The other day I was reading an article. I don’t even remember who the actress was, but she’s been around for a long time. She said something like, “I’m proud that I’ve had a whole career without making it to rehab.” I thought, That’s such a negative twist on it. I’m proud of people who have the determination and the fearlessness to actually go and face their demons and get better. This is a life or death situation. Again, I’m not a spokesperson for this, but it’s just that I want to support people for their decisions when they do go in and get help.

DC: You might think it’s a new problem, but it’s probably only because people are quicker to say, “Okay, I’m going to rehab. Let’s get it over with.”

EM: It’s because everybody is so highly visible now. We see everything. We see what celebrities buy at the supermarket. It’s ridiculous. It’s that visibility. I’m confused by this whole celebrity-obsessed culture. It’s really weird.

DC: Again, I wasn’t trying to be . . . Well, I was trying to be flip, but not trying to be dismissive. I do take it very seriously myself. You could just say, “I don’t want to talk about that.” Which is fine.

EM: I’ve given you a more interesting answer, I hope, than to just say, “I don’t want to talk about it.” [laughs] There are so many lies out there regarding my recent trip to Cirque Lodge. But I don’t care what people think. I just don’t care. So I will neither confirm nor deny. I think now we just know way too much about our celebrities. It’s not that interesting when you know that much about people. I have no ego about me. It’s just better for you not to know, because it really
does make me a better actor at the end of the day. You’re not going into the movie with all
these specifics about me.

DC: I don’t know what I would do if all my business was out there . . .

EM: You know what? You wouldn’t feel that bad, because so much of it is not true. Actually, the media has been pretty nice to me. They’ve really trashed some people, so I’m actually thankful that it didn’t get too crazy. But for all the stuff that came out a few months ago about substance abuse, there were so many wrong stories. I was so happy about that, because it’s when they get the real scoop that would make me really nervous. It’s a relief, in a way. You want it to be a lie, because when it’s true, that’s when I’d be like, “Oh, my God!” It’s time to rethink who’s in your circle, because stuff got out.

For those of us who grew up in the 80s Molly Ringwald was the leader of the Brat Pack.

Nowadays the actress is 40 years old and is set to rekindle her career with a new television drama.

ABC’s ‘Secret Life of the American Teenager’ stars Ringwald as the mother of a 15-year-old girl who became pregnant after a one night stand.

Ringwald spoke with AOL TV about her controversial role and her classic teen flicks of the 80s.

What made you decide to do a TV show?

I was thinking about moving to Los Angeles for personal reasons — my husband’s going to be attending a Stanford MBA program in the fall. So this series sort of came up, and I really liked Brenda [Hampton], the creator. She really wanted to have me in the show, and she was persuasive and I liked the subject matter, and it just kind of seemed like a cool thing to do.

Given the teen pregnancy pact scandal and the success of ‘Juno,’ your series is timely. Will the pregnancy plotline continue for the whole season?

It definitely starts out as the event that kicks off the show, but the show is about more than that. It has to be about more than that, because that story line is going to resolve itself. It really is sort of a sociological study of these teenagers and their families.

What other kinds of things happen to your character, Anne?

My character doesn’t find out [about her daughter's pregnancy] until episode 6, and the audience pretty much knows from the beginning, so there’s that suspense about when the family is going to find out. My character’s not clued in to what’s right in front of her. That has to do with her own life, and the decline of her marriage, and the fact that she’s really not happy with where she’s at in life.

Have you had input into your character?

Definitely. When the pilot was written, Brenda didn’t know that I was going to play Anne. Getting to know me and my strengths as an actor made the character evolve a certain way. I mean, she’s still different from me. But there are elements of me in Anne, and I definitely made her more liberal, because it’s really important to me that both sides are represented. Brenda’s totally supportive of that.

So will Amy explore all of her pregnancy options, no matter how controversial they may be?

Yes. I will say that Amy makes her own choice in terms of what she wants to do about her pregnancy. And it was very, very important to me that that was clear. Though I won’t tell you what [Amy's] choice is right now..

In the ’80s, you were the go-to teen actress. Is it weird to be playing the mom of a teenager now?

It is weird, but it’s kind of good, too. I’m an actor and I’ve done a lot of different stuff, but because those movies were so successful, it’s kind of stuck in people’s heads that I’m that figure. It’s good for me to be seen in a different light. I’m in a project with teenagers and I’m not the teenager, so I’ve come full circle in a way.

A couple of years ago there were rumors of a ‘Sixteen Candles’ sequel. Where does that stand now?

It was in the works. It was something that I definitely wanted to do, but [writer-director] John Hughes wasn’t interested, and I didn’t feel comfortable doing it without his involvement. If we can get John to agree, I think it would be great. I think there are definitely a lot of people who would love to see it, and I would love to do it.

Is ‘Sixteen Candles’ the only one of your teen movies you’d like to revisit?

I think so. I would ordinarily not want to do something like that, but I think that ‘Sixteen Candles’ lends itself to [a sequel]. I mean, ‘Breakfast Club,’ is just so perfect as is. I guess ‘Pretty in Pink’ is possible, but ‘Sixteen Candles’ is really the one … it was such a Cinderella story. And I was interested to see what happened to this girl.

Do you ever watch any of those movies when you come across them on TV?

I don’t really sit down and watch them. I mean, I’ve seen them so many times, you know? I think when my daughter’s old enough, I’ll probably watch them with her.